Johnny B. Goode Tonight

So this morning I woke up to Back To The Future Part Two or something. I watched that for a while before calling Carol to see what time I should come over. She was asleep and told me to come at about four. I watched more movie and then got my lazy ass up and dressed and then went to Walgreens down the road to get trashbags. Colour coded. Ace.

I drove to Carol's and we drove around for a bit before finding a convenient park with trashcans. We took everything out of my car and then sorted through it, throwing half of it away, packing some in black bags to take with us, and putting some in white bags to leave at Mum's house.

We decided to run over to Mum's to drop off the bags. We were talking about crossing the border and Carol said something about me being a liability or something and just as she said, I fell down the basement stairs. It hurt so bad. I was like "I have to lie down. Hold on." So I limped over and fell face first onto the futon for a minute while Carol laughed her ass off. I wish I could, mine is still killing me.

We visited Moo and Lilu, and Vespa of course. She was actually friendly today instead of being a total cunt like normal. I can't wait to take Moo with me when I get my own place. I hope she'll be alive. She's a bit old.

I dropped Carol off back at her house then went home. I watched more movie and then decided to chill with Eric for a bit and watch Shang High Noon with him for a bit. Then I got tired so I went to bed, but I'm way too excited to sleep.

I'm so tired though.

The Devistating Backstroke

So yesterday I hung out with Brendan which was honestly awful. He's far more annoying than I remember him being. So I cut that visit rather short. I now have monstro hickey right over a birthmark that apparently looks like a hickey anyway. I think it looks like a swastika. Whatever. Now when anyone actually asks if its a hickey, I'll have to say yes. Boo.

Crap time with shitty camp friends was easily made up when I called my bff Carol and asked if she could and wanted to come to Toronto with me for newyears. She said yes and so did her mom. Yay! Roadtrip! I went and picked her up and we hightailed it over to inkslingers to get my lip pierced. John actually asked if I burnt myself with a curling iron. Hahaha.

Lip piercings turned out sweeeet. I can't wait to get smaller rings put in. Its going to look epic. Alex says its too much, but I don't think so. Anyway, this lady got a tattoo of a rainbow kokopeli or however its spelt because she is an author. "Oh, cool. What do you write?" "Gay erotica fiction." "Oh. ...my parents are gay..."

Haha! We promptly went out to the front room silently laughing. Jesus on a cracker. But when we're there, we really do whatever we want since we're totally VIP customers.

I was freaking out before I got my shit pierced because Carol kept saying it was going to hurt A LOT. John sprayed my lip with some novacaine that he smuggled in from tiajuanna (sp?). It mostly made all of the inside of my mouth numb and it felt super weird. Carol held my hand the whole time, which was great because the last time anyone held my hand for a piercing or whatever I was 15 and it was my navel that was getting the needle. Thanks Carol!!

We headed over to 7-11 to get a slurpee and decided that John lieks meeee. Which I don't mind at all. He's totally adorable anyway. I got a blue raspberry and vanilla cream flavoured slurpee. It was aces hight. Carol got coffee. We also bought this crazy stretchy pink spiney penis with eyes that has this light up thing in it. I guess it was supposed to be a caterpillar.

We didn't quite want to go home so we went up to movie 16 at the mutant mall. That place is sooo ghetto creepy. We decided to see Saw V. It was pretty good. Totally sick and twisted of course.

Anyway, I'm going over to hers later today to pick her up and go park by a dumpster so that we can clean out my car. Aces! I fucking love that girl.

Jesus.

Good Lord I hate border patrol. Today was the family Christmas party in River Canard, which is about 20 minutes outside of Windsor.

I woke up early enough and made myself some tofu noodles with soy sauce and molasses which were super yumm. Anyway, I talked to Alex on the phone forever which was aces. I went and got gasoline and gatorade before heading across the border.

So, my car is super mess and I have like... 6 or so stolen McCain lawn signs in there. I told the guy at customs what was in the back, clothes, shoes, stolen McCain lawn signs, and he thought I meant like... jacked street signs and told me he could get me arrested. He scared the shit out of me for like... 3 minutes just talking about that and then clarified exactly what kind of signs they were. He was like, oh... well that's childish but fine. Go ahead to your family party. I was like, HOLYFUCKINGSHIT.

Anyway, family party was good. Marty is a TOTAL brat and a half. The first thing he says when I walk in is, "you look weird." I was like, "durrr... i AM weird." Uncle Joe was there, which was way cool. I miss him. Since he got divorced from Aunt Renee, he never comes around anymore so it was aces seeing him. Anyway, we did the white elephant thing and I ended up with some decidedly non-vegan candy... oops. Oh well. I ate it anyway. No use wasting excellent Toblerone and Worther's.

Anyway, I went home and on the way through the border, got asked if I had been arrested or did drugs at least 3 times each. I was like, no. Seriously. But yeah... fun times. I got some fries at Maccas because they're so epic. When I got home I interneted for a while before talking to Alex for the first time in FOREVER. I miss him!!! Anyway, a little ways into the conversation, he asked if I was really pregnant.

WHHAAAAATTT?!?!!?!!? Um... no. I'm not.

Anyway, apparently Mrs. Smith didn't get that the preggo ness was a halloween costume. So she told her husband, Greg, Alex, and a bunch of other people. AWKWARD. Anyway, I cleared that up fast.

I'm hanging out with my friend Brendan tomorrow and then he's taking me to get my lip pierced. YEE!!! I'll post pictures. But first we're gonna make OUTTTT. Yay! I'll have a new answer to put on surveys besides, Libby, as the last person I kissed. Hahaha.

Yeah. Awkward day.

Hmmm... Yes.

After The Eulogy

This morning Mum and I went to Aunt Pat's funeral. In my humble opinion, funerals are the worst thing on earth... just short of silverfish, getting blood drawn, and seeing people throw up.

When my mum was in nursing school, Pat was her roommate, and then they started dating and had grand drinking adventures, such as bringing a full body resuscitation anne dressed in the school uniform to the bar with them and then getting caught while sneaking it back in. My parents were at the conception of Pat's son, Jesse. A bit awkward I guess. But apparently they decided to have a party to artificially inseminate Kris, so my cousin was conceived surrounded by lesbians.

I was born in Seattle, and when we moved to Michigan when I was two weeks old, we lived at Pat and Kris' house. We had Canadian Thanksgiving at their house, went over every Christmas to exchange presents, had birthday parties together, and sometimes went over for dinner just for fun while I was growing up. Pat and Kris were basically second parents and my mum is one of Jesse's many godmothers.

Until today, I hadn't seen any of them for about five years. Last time I saw Aunt Pat, I never thought it would be the last time I would ever see her in my life. I can't stand the fact that I'm never going to see her again. I'll never get to hug her, and I will never hear her laugh again, and Aunt Pat was ALWAYS laughing; her laugh stands out among all my other memories of her. I missed her before she died, words pale in comparison to my current feelings. I kind of just expected her to walk in laughing at the funeral, just for fun, it's really hard to believe that she's gone.

My mother discovered my "Imperio" tattoo at the funeral which was slightly comical. I was adjusting my bracelets and she glanced down and asked, "What's that?" Thinking she was talking about one of my new bracelets which has a scorpion encased in glow in the dark resin, I said, "A scorpion." She grabbed my hand, turned it over and stared at my wrist for a minute. Oh. That. She didn't ask, just sort of shook her head.

There was a reception sort of thing back at their house. The food was epic. I walked in and wondered aloud if there was anything I could eat, and at least five people started pointing out things that were vegan. I was like, how did you know? It was a little crazy. Afterward, I stood around with mum while she talked to a bunch of people about how my mother's brain is deteriorating. Pleasant. I just love thinking about it, especially after a funeral. When my parents die, I probably wont go to the funerals. I don't think I could stand it.

I came home and danced around my room naked to Rihanna's "Disturbia" I seriously love that song.

And Then They Took My Blood Type

I slept in way late yet I'm still tired super early. Maybe I have mono haha. I don't fucking know. Anyway christmas was ace. There was nothing vegan to eat and I have come to the conclusion that I really don't enjoy cousin Lyle's presence, but he doesn't seem to enjoy my sarcastic nature, so whatever. I wish I were home. Oh well. Anyway, I dipped out of festivities at current time seven pm to quickly blog and then go to sleep.

This was the worst Christmas of my life.

Baby I'm Your Man

So today I had too super weird dreams, both involving death and one involving schizophrenic juggalos on public transportatin. Wtf is wrong with my head is indeed a mystery, especially to me.

Anywho, when I finally got my ass off the couch where I currently sleep, I took a shower, and, for the first time in at least 9 months, I did my hair up. Of course I've had a mohican/mohawk/whatever for nearly a year but this is only the second time I've ever bothered to put it up. The first time my hair was nearly too long so I decided I wouldn't bother and then it went away for a while but now its back so I figure why the hecks not? My grandmother hates it.

Awkward Uncle Dave came tonight we had an excellent time with camera phones at dinner. Uncle Dave and I hve come to the conclusion that Shanye (Told) looks almost exactly like a young Lyle. This is probably why I don't find him remotely attractive, if I did, that would probably be way awkward and a half because not only is Lyle married with two children, he is also my cousin. Ick.

Anyway David and I decided to go out and get eggnog and such. Or, as I apparently like to call it while playing word games, eegnog. Fun times. Anyway, I convinced him to buy a whole bunch of other stuff since I guess my mother didn't warn him that I'm tricksy like that. Veganog is a billion times yummier than actual eggnog which is apparently supposed to be ingested with alcohol. Growing up with two rather straight-edge parents, I was unnaware of this custom. Talking of which, I always sort of think about becomming straight-edge again, but I really don't see the point as I hate being drunk, so I don't do that anyway and my lungs don't let me smoke weed all that often, but I would kind of miss all the terribly amusing things I say when I'm high. Such as, "if I die, don't tell my mother." I'm a weirdo, but I love it.

Anyway, my mother and uncle and I pissed off the grands who decided to go to bed early. My grandma is ace. She's half way between a bitch and a comedian and I never know when she is actually serious. I'm in stitches whenever she's around. My (step) grandfather is from England so he's adorrably British. He used to be devistatingly handsome but now he's just old and has parkinsons, so he's just kind of endearingly steriotypical. My actual grandfather died before I was born, but from what I hear he was kind of an assbag, so I'm not all that dissappointed about never having met him. My mum's dad was aces enough anyway, although he was a little wonky at the end due to alzheimers.

A game of scrabble at which everyone cheated was played and I got away with the most epic of word combos. Ive and ven just by putting a random v down somewhere. I'm amazed that I got away with such bullshit.

Anyway, happy Christmas.

Her Name Is Noel; She Rings My Bell

Today I woke up super early for me and promptly fell back to sleep. My mother bribed me into going to breakfast with a promise of hair gel. We went to a cafe with the grands and I had the most epic tofu scramble ever. It had avacado and tomatoes in it; I'll be wanting more tomorrow.

After breakfast, my mother and I walked to Long's to get hairshit. I literally ran into my uncle and cousin while strolling around looking at the floor which was super awkward. After we were done shopping, we went outside to wait to be picked up by my grandma. While we were out waiting, some 40 year old loser who hated life decided to give me hair advice. He was like, "You should grow out the back blah, blah, blah and wear your 'hawk like that." I ignored him and he kept talking loudly at me while locking his bike up. He clearly didn't understand that his advice was unwelcome.

Any normal person would get the clue to STFU, but this freak didn't seem to get it. Oh well. Anyway, he basically said that I should wear it in a mullhawk, "hey 90's I miss you! come back!" ...Lying. Please don't. I hate it when people refer to a mohawk as a "hawk" just like I hate it when people call tattoos "tats". It sounds retarded and besides, it's a hairstyle and tribe of indigenous peoples; not a bird. I personally prefer to do it up English and call it a mohican. The man's loud suggestions honestly made me laugh my ass off. I suppose this was rude, but so was he.

On his way into the store, finally, he goes, "Believe it or not, I used to call myself gutter punk. I still wear the colours." As soon as the doors closed behind him my mother turns to me and completely deadpan, says, "He used to be gutter punk. Aren't you impressed?" I literally collapsed on the ground laughing. I really did almost pee. My mother is hilarious; and I was highly un-impressed. On his way back out of the shop, he decided to address my mother. "Mom, don't worry, this phase she's in will pass. I dropped out of it after about ten years." As if my mother was remotely ashamed of me. And there is no "phase" that I'm in. I enjoy having unique hair is all. I don't label myself anything as I neither believe in labels nor think I fit under any that exist. Clearly he hated his life and was jealous that I was so comfortable. I suppose he thought I was trying to rebel. I was just a bit of a rebel when I was 17 since I wasn't allowed to do certain things. Being 18 I just do whatever I want and am allowed to anyway, so it's no rebellion. How sad and pathetic this man was.

He took it just a step too far though when he was riding away, calling back, "Lay off the drugs." How fucking dare anyone make assumptions like that about me based on my hair. Just because I'm relaxed and comfortable about myself does not at all mean that I'm on drugs since I'm not angry at the world like he probably was. I mean, yeah, I do hate quite a few people, but that's because as a whole, I think people are stupid, and I'm kind of a genius. Not my fault. I shouted back, "I'm straight-edge, thanks!" Which really isn't true, but it's better than saying, "I rarely smoke pot and I drink responsibly!" besides, I was wearing a shirt that said, "Kiss me. I don't smoke." Durr... fucking hate morons.

After that lovely incident, an excellent woman talked to me about my awesome hair, asked if I was in cosmetology school, which I'm going to be, and said, "Don't worry; I'll run him over when I leave." I gave her a hug. Grandma took my mother and I to a vegan bakery which was aces high. I got short bread and cupcakes, then we picked up my cousin. I watched Home Alone 3 which is the funniest Christmas movie ever.

Sorry! is decidedly my least favourite game in the universe. It sucks and a half.

Whenever I Want You, All I Have To Do Is Dream

So this morning I woke up at a decent hour and got dressed in a flash and ran out to the car and we drove up to Boulder Creek to get our nails done. Mine are dark blue with sparkles; pretty ace.

Anyway, on the way back, I decided I wanted my hair done. We had Mexican for lunch, well, I had chips. Then we went to the redwood forrest for a little bit and didn't walk around since it was too cold, but I climbed up on this huge sign and my mom took my picture on it.

We got back into town and stopped off at the local cosmetology school to see if I could get my hair done. I could! This hot metal chick named Grace did my hair. She had some ace tattoos, including a huge elaborate spade right over her throat. She said she had gotten some Johnny Thunders lyrics on her ribs and that hurt so badly that everything else is a walk in the park. I don't care. I still want Psalm 23 down the right side of my ribcage and something else on the other side as well.

I guess I've decided to fuck it all, because I've got my hawk back. Haha... I can't seem to stay away from it. I love it though. The whole process took three hours! First she shaved it back into a hawk because it was uneven and the sides had gotten long. Anyway, we bleached it all out, died the top red, coon-tailed the fringe red and black, and then put black zebra stripes on the sides. It's aces high and a half. Pictures coming later. Anyway, my online buddy Kate came in while I was looking super dorky with foil all in my face so we finally got to meet which was totally stellar. She was great.

Anyway, I hung out at home on facebook for a bit before discovering that my sort-of aunt Pat died yesterday morning. I was horrified because it was totally unexpected, I'm basically half a world away right now, and she really helped raise me. She and my mum were roommates in nursing school before they started dating and then they were best friends after that. But we haven't been as close in recent years, but when my "cousin" Jesse and I were young, we always went over there Christmas afternoon. I'm really going to miss her. She was always a lot of fun when we did see each other. Mum and I are going to the funeral since I'll be back by then.

I made some fierce bread pudding while talking on the phone to my awkward uncle Dave. He's so great. I haven't talked to him in forever, but we really get each other and when I'm home, I'll be calling him a lot I think since it's free as we both have Verizon, besides, he's really a laugh. He's a guitar player/computer programer and a total paranoid pessimist. I love him. Anyway, he's coming for Christmas which should be really great. I'm excited!

I'm totally jet lagged still, which I'm pretty stoked about because I'd rather not adjust to this time zone, thank you very much. I'll be sleeping now.

...it's me.

I was going to write a great blog today about how I had a really exciting day for once...

And then I found out that my aunt who, when I was little, was basically another parent to me, died yesterday morning.

But maybe later I'll feel up to writing about how great my day was.

Close Your Eyes, Clear Your Heart

So this morning I woke up and my right arm hurt like crazy. I guess I slept on it weird. Anyway, brushing my teeth was like torture, I had to do it with my left hand which was just awkward.

My aunt and I went shopping at Target, we didn't really get much. I got us hot chocolate at Starbucks though. I guess everyone here gets a lot of Starbucks, it's not like I'm any different at home though. The Bucks at Eaton is really close.

I talked to Stephanie for a while which was fun and I had an epic phone conversation with Kate.

I've just realized that one of my favourite songs is not about vampires, but pro-vegitarian... check it out.

Anyway, I guess I'm just going to couch (bed) in the hope that when I wake up, my arm will feel better.

Oh. There was an earthquake earlier today. I slept through it.

I hate this place. I want to go home.

Fuck. Why Not.

001.Name: Jordan Danielle Michaela Lambert Wright (ew)
002.D.O.B.: 27th June, 1990
003.Location: Santa Cruz, California
004.Religion: Undecided
005.Occupation: The only thing I can really put is "model"

APPEARANCE

001.Hair: Dark brown naturally, currently that and purple
002.Eyes: Amber
003.Height: Short. OH. Uh... 5'4" maybe?

STYLE

001.Clothing: Anything black, haha, I dunno; it changes
002.Music: Literally everything
003.Make up: Um... whatever I feel like. Rarely mascara.
004.Body art: I prefer the term mods. At present 6 peircings (I've had 18 or so though), 10 tattoos by my count, 2 scarifications that haven't faded.

RIGHT NOW

001.Wearing: Micky pants (so comfy!!!!!omjesus), cami, stein shirt, best plain black zip up hoodie ever, I live life in this sweatshirt, ferrealz.
002.Listening to: Oingo Boingo hahahahahahaha... Danny Elfman is such a fox.
003.Thinking of: How epically fucking cold it is here right now.

LAST THING YOU

001.Bought: A maple leaf tattoo. It was $40 and it's on my ass. Ace.
002.Ate & drank: Uh......... chocolate soy milk and thai food.
003.Read: I re-read HP 7 the other day. <3
004.Watched on TV: Psh.... TV... so vintage. ........lies. If only I had cable.

EITHER / OR

001.Club or house party: I like shows more than anything else.
002.Tea or coffee: Chai tea.
003.Achiever or slacker: Bwahaha... achievers don't drop out of high school. Slacker fer sher.
004.Beer or cider: Guinness draught. lies.
005.Drinks or shots: Either.
006.Cats or dogs: Cats and dogs that don't lick.
007.Single or taken: It's terribly complicated.
008.Pen or pencil: Pen if I'm writing on something squishy, pencil if I'm writing on something hard. Whatever shows up the darkest.
009.Gloves or mittens: Gloves for snowboarding, mittens for looking adorable and a half.
010.Food or candy: I lived off of megawarheads for a second.
011.Cassette or cd: Mp3 or vinyl.
012.Coke or pepsi: Cocaine before either. I hate pop.
013.Hard or mild alcohol: Wtf is mild alcohol?
014.Matches or a lighter: Matches or a zippo.
015.Sunset beach or the bold and the beautiful: Uh... what?
016.Ricki Lake or Oprah Winfrey: Hmmm... Ricki Lake for movies, Oprah Winfrey for Obama acceptance speaches.

WHO DO YOU WANT TO

001.Kill: So many people... so little time. I fucking hate people. I'm not nice. Sorry.
002.Hear from: If Moo had thumbs and could speak English... however, I wouldn't mind hearing from Mum.
003.Get really wasted with: No one. I don't enjoy the feeling of being intoxicated, thanks.
004.Look like: Ha, as if. I'm fucking hot. I like looking like myself.
005.Be like: I think I mentioned how I feel about people. I'm not this arrogant in person, I promise.

LAST PERSON YOU?

001.Touched: Myself... not like that.
002.Talked to: Derek!!!!! <3
003.Hugged: Grandma?
004.Instant messaged: My friendly ex bf Louis. =]
005.Kissed: Libby. Ahh... my life.
006.Who broke your heart: Um... that doesn't happen to me. But if it did, it would have happened when I was in 10 grade and it would have been a combination of Ben Barker and Sam Ashmore all at once.

WHERE DO YOU

001.Eat: Wherever my mouth is.
002.Dance: Wherever my legs are.
003.Cry: Wherever my heart breaks.
004.Wish you were: Home.

HAVE YOU EVER

001.Dated one of your best friends? Yeah.
002.Loved somebody so much it makes you cry? *sigh* Yes.
003.Drank alcohol? Frequently.
004.Done drugs? Um... if I thought pot counted as a drug I'd say yes.
005.Broken the law? Clearly.
006 Ran away from home? Just the once for a minute.
007.Broken a bone? I don't think so.
008.Cheated on a test? Nope, never.
009.Skinny dipped? Love it.
010.Played truth or dare? Haha, I love that game, I don't even care.
011.Flashed someone? Chest only.
012.Mooned Someone? Once or twice.
013.Kissed someone you didn't know? I like kissing too much to get to know people first... haha. JKish. I didn't really know TJ or Jon the first time I kissed either of them.
014.Been on a talk show/game show? No.
015.Been in a fight? I'm afraid of fighting people. I don't like pain, but I love bruises. Haha.
016.Ridden in a fire truck? Not really.
017.Been on a plane? All the time.
018.Come close to dying? I'm dying right now. And so are you.
019.Cheated on your boy/girlfriend? The only thing I cheat on are board games.
020.Gave someone a piggy back/shoulder ride? I give Carol piggy backs at shows haha.
021.Eaten a worm/mud pie? EW. No way.
022.Swam in the ocean? And the sea.
023.Had a nightmare/dream that made you wake up? I have the creepiest dreams ever.

Then Jump Repeat To The Swinging Beat

Bloody fuck and Jesus on a cracker (thanks Rob) it's COLD here! Everyone is like, oh, California? Yeah... it's warm there.

Fucking as if. It's 50 if I'm lucky.

Anyway, this morning I woke up at 11 something or other my time, but 8 something or other California time. Breaky was good. After breakfast, we went to some shopping centre a little ways away to buy cake tins or something. Afterward we went to Starbucks. Yay for peppermint venti soy no whip hot chocolate. There's a picture on my myspace... I can't bother to figure out how to post it from my grandparents' computer though.

At noonish we walked a bit aways to the theatre and two feet from the house we came across the angriest hobo EVER. He was going through a dumpster and had trash spread all across the sidewalk. He got super pissed off because my mom stepped on this random bag of something on the ground and he was like, "fuck you! that's my dinner... stupid people who have everything, blah blah blah..." what a fucking creeper, ferrealz.

My grandmother called the police and told them to get rid of him... which was just a little hilarious. Anyway, we met up with cousin Lyle, his wife Daria, and their kids Wyatt and Gwendolyn at the theatre and went and saw cousin Clarissa in The Nutcracker. Guys in ubertight pants... yum. But I spent most of it texting my friend Roger.

I had dinner after and then Clarissa, aunt Virginia, and uncle Tom came over for more dinner. Clarissa and I caught up for a bit which is always fun. She's pretty ace for a ten year old.

I'm quickly getting used to this time zone. Oh noes!

The Preacher Likes The Cold

Good God. Today was a blizzard. It snowed like fuck all night and we ended up with more than a foot of snow. Eric drove me to the aeroport, muttering his usual mother fucker every ten seconds which is always tres amusant.

I stood in some pointless line for an hour and then listened to Disturbia on repeat while waiting for the plane. My row mate was some cool girl from Nicaragua who goes to U of M.

Highlight of my life: drink lady is coming around and asks what I want, rum and cranberry juice; a cape cod. Off dhe goes and comes back with both, hands me the rum, and doesn't even ask my age. I'm like, fuck, how old do I look? Apparently at least 25 according to my rowmate. It was so ace.

Hauled ass to get to the plane in Houston on time. Barely made it. Sat next to some cool chick from Texas who was going to Cali for Xmas to visit her parents. She was pretty boss. The turbulence was pretty fucking rad.

Daria came and picked me up with Wyatt and Gwendoline. They're way too fucking adorable. Gwendoline says kisstmiss. It's literally the cutest thing ever and the both of them sound like chipmunks or something.

Fun times with Grandma are always the best ever. She's so fucking crazy, I love it!

He's All Of 31 And He's Only 17

So I haven't really been doing much of anything lately. Yesterday I stayed home almost the whole day save for a short trip to Walgreens.

Today I went and cashed a cheque and paid my rent. Then I went and got a maple leaf tattooed on my ass. Hell fucking yeah.

I can't wait to go to Cali tomorrow.

Hairy Sex Octopus

The following is bits of a conversation a friend and I had the other day. I won't say who it's about because you don't need to know for it to be epic. It began with a creepy picture link I sent him which led to more pictures. Anyway here it is.

D: He looks like the worst pervert ever right there. Like, I'm talking creepy substitute.

R: Yup. He's touched a child in its pants before.

D: I know right? Like for the love of god, shave. Please. Ubercreeper.

R: When is that pic from?

D: Two days ago.

R: Yikes.

D: I know! It's an interesting sweater as well...

R: It's a Cosby sweater.

D: He would look 10 times less creepy if he were wearing a t-shirt.

R: Haha. I agree.

D: I think we should break into his apartment, burn his sweater, and you hold him down, while I shave his face.

R: Haha. Alright let's do it.

D: (Send pic)

R: Old skool. Wow. Fuck me, when the hell was this?

D: 2002?

R: That must have been like fucking 10 years ago. They all look twelve. This bothers me. (Send pic)

D: Yeah... Are those midgets...?

R: Yeah idk. But it's creepy. Holy *** ***** ***** obsession.

D: I know, right?

R: I don't really enjoy them.

D: I like them sometimes. That reminds me of a picture... (Send pic)

R: Lol.

D: (Send pic) Omg. I can't breathe. Hahaha.

R: Holy shit. Lol.

D: Omg.

R: That fucking rules.

D: You missed that one?

R: Yes. He should really not put pics like that up. Someone could see them! Like us!

D: Lmao. Omg. I think I'm dying. (Send pic) I think I die laughing every time I see this picture.

R: Santa sucks.

D: Santa is so traumatizing. (Send pic) ????

R: It's all random shit.

D: Whhhy?

R: Spaceheater?

D: Hahaha. (Send pic) awkward.

R: Yeah, it's creepy. I saw that one.

D: Haha. A lot of these are creepy. (Send link) Wow. I'm scerred. I love how fucking ridiculous people are. Mornings like this make me love my life.




A little while later we talked about chemo therapy and I said I would rather die of cancer. My friend said: yeah, so not only do you have cancer, but you're bed ridden with cancer and no hair.

So genius.

Run Neon Tiger, There's A Price On Your Head

I would just like to re-iterate how truly fucking epic I think The Killers are.

Maybe Jackson Does The Astro

Yesterday I went shopping in the morning for Mum's present. I went to FYE and got her a gift certificate as well as one from Borders and some yummy smelling shower gel from bath and body works.I also bought Silverstein's two most recent albums while I was at the mall. After that I headed home for a little bit and then I got starving so I headed over to Mum's and chilled with Moo for a bit. She's the cutest ever. Anyway Mum loved her present and the card. She said she only got me a few presents, but as it turns out, she got me a huge bag full. Ace.

So we went to this cute restaurant called Pete's which was right near Goodrich. I had really good pasta and then for dessert I had fried pineapple with rum sauce which was good as hell. Anyway after that I went home and watched three DVDs which my mother got me for Christmas. John Cleese was a total babe when he was younger.

This afternoon I went to the mall with some christmas money and bought a new belt that actually fits, as well as a Cd player and some headphones since mine are broken and my ipod is totally wonky. I also bought some batteries at target.

After that, I went to the tattoo parlour to get my wings shaded some more, but I ended up just hanging out and making people think I worked there which was pretty funny. Some guy got his tongue pierced and he was pretty boss. Anyway I hung out all day there with some awsome strippers who were from Vegas. Brandon and I went and got slurpees after a bit, came back and smoked a blunt, and then was totally tripping while watching Ricki getting her boyfriend's last name tattooed down her spine. Ouch.

Anyway I drove Brandon home and it was snowing like hell. I kept thinking I was about to slide off the road like I did once last year while driving around with Brad. It was crazy, I swerved up onto someone's lawn to avoid a car, slid for a few houses, and then swerved back onto the road to avoid a tree. All with Brad calmly talking on his phone. Craziness.

I might chill with Eric for a while tonight, but I might just go to sleep.

When I Had You To Myself I Didn't Want You Around

So I accidentally pushed the back button instead of the delete button a second ago when I had already had almost all of what I was going to say typed out. Fuck. My. Life.

I miss Moo like crazy. I would do anything to see her right now but I'm pretty sure that wouldn't be appreciated due to the current time.

Anyway, as I currently have no computer internet access I am forced to forget about photoblogging until I move or work something else out. Which really sucks sing I've gotten two new tattoos in as many days. But they'll be up soon enough I suppose.

So later today I'm having christmas with Mum since I will be in Cali for actual christmas. It should be fun enough if she doesn't bring up the fact that I skipped my anthropology final and didn't bother to write the paper anyway. I really hope she doesn't. I honestly have nothing to say if she does mention it.

I'm still not sure what I'm getting her for christmas. I'll go shopping once I wake up later I guess. Talking of christmas gifts, yesterday (Saturday) I kidnapped my mother, blindfolded her, and took her to get her first tattoo as a christmas present... Naturally while we were there I couldn't resist getting something as well and I now have a complete set of wrist tattoos. Fierce.

I'm not going to lie, I'm a little jealous of my mom's tattoo. Not of the subject matter, just of the bright colours. I have an abundance of black text and greyscale work, but the only colours on me are miniscule ammounts of red and green on opposite ends and sides of my body from each other. This will change eventually but black remains my favourite colour so I'm not too bothered about it.

Still talking of tattoos, I wonder if I will get enough christmas money to go get inky in Cali, but then again, I can probably get it done significantly cheaper at home.
I'm kind of thinking of getting Psalm 23:4 of the King James version down the side of my ribs for funsies. I love text tattoos. Words speak to me more than pictures, I think its because I'm a total nerd and bibliophile. Also, I'm rather loving the idea of getting Sodom and Gomorrah tattooed onto the fronts of my ankles. But I'm not going to go rushing into that one any time soon.

There are so many tattoos that I want done all at once. I hate waiting. I feel like my entire life up to now I've just been waiting to break free. And now I am and I'm playing catch up a little. But it's a pretty fucking epic game of it that I've got going on here. I grew up so bloody sheltered. I swear I'm never going to do that to my kids. I'm not a very protective person anyway; fiercly loyal but not sheltering by any means. I'm sure I get it from the parents I've never met, specifically my mother I would assume from what I've heard of her.

Anyway I suppose I should maybe consider sleep right about now.

Truth Is You Can Stop And Stare

So my headphones are decidedly broken. Fuckkk. I need good headphones at all times. The only way they work correctly is if I ditch the long cord and keep the short cord tight with my computer, which really isn't all that great because my computer doesn't have all that much music on it and Eric still hasn't fixed the internet so I can't pirate any. This is so sucky.

Anyway, my original plan for the day was to stay in bed because I totally got thrashed boarding yesterday and everything hurts. Then I remembered that I had 50 dollars and I get up for tattoos any day any time.

I got crucio on my right wrist. Next time I get money I'm getting imperio on my left wrist. It's super pretty and just a little evil looking. When the internet works again you'll have pictures but until then, check my facebook.

Anyway, I'm going to do nothing until late in the night/early in the morning at which point I will pass out.

I Wanna Hurt You Just To Hear You Screaming My Name

So this morning I went to my mother's bright and early to weasle some money out of her. Very successful indeed. Anyway, after we had breakfast I played KH2 for a while which is always megafun.

I took a nap. Unpleasant dreams of a certain someone ensued and I woke up with some random man leaning over me and scrubbing at the couch. Awkward.

After I had lunch with my mother, I headed to modern skate and surf for some much needed gear. I got some totally boss burton snowpants that I'm totally in love with, the best pair of goggles I've ever had, and a dakine hat that I'm sure I didn't need, but I fucking love hats so whatever.

I headed up to P to the fucking K-nob ater that, got all of my gear on, and got fucking snowy. I fucked up my left knee, right hip, the surface of my left hip, and both of my wrists. I've also discovered why I don't ski anymore; I suck!!!

I was boarding down shaboom and I totally ate it all down the hill and got ice burn on my hip and stomach. Not fun.

My new headphones might be rather brokenish... Ill have to look into it.

Anyway, I'm super tired and not looking forward to how my body will feel tomorrow.

I Did My Best To Notice When The Call Came Down The Line

I went to sleep at 10 last night, woke up at 2:30 and had breakfast after chilling with my roommate Jacky who is going back to Taiwan tomorrow.

Anyway, I was sitting in my room listening to music when I remembered exactly how much I miss my ex boyfriend. I mean, I hate him with a passion, but sometimes I miss him anyway. We used to get into so much trouble and we drove eachother nuts, but we always managed to have a ton of fun.

Like, this one time I hung out with his best friend all day and had this crazy huge fight about it and a few other things, and then his cousin, him, and I cleaned out Jay's van and took a bunch of things since he said we could... We were so crazy.

I wouldn't go back out with him, ever, but I miss having that much fun.

This other time, we fell asleep while watching a movie at my house, and then when I went to drop him back off at his house, I just kept driving until I got to some lake and we parked and walked around and just talked forever even though we both had school the next morning. I got in so much trouble with my mum for that! On the way home, I let him drive and we nearly got pulled over... Hahahahahahahahaha awesome times.

Lord Knows I'm A Voodoo Child, Baby

So, this morning I passed out hoping not to dream. Do I ever get my wish? Of course not.

I had this weird dream about a carnival, probably influenced by Final Destination 3 that I watched with Eric last night. Anyway, guess who was in it? My haunter. Thanks.

I woke up at 1, talked to some people online and then got dressed and headed to Verizon to get my phone fixed. It didn't take long, all they did was reset it, which was convenient and I can do it myself if it stops working again.

After that, I headed down to ROT to get my lip touched up. Fun times, but I love that it's free.

I like that it's still bloody in the picture.

I discovered, when I tried to rent Kill BIll Volume 1 that we don't have a Blockbuster movie pass anymore, so I headed right to the grocery store and bought a whole bunch of microwaveable thai food. YUM!!!

Anyway, I suppose I might go to sleep soonish, because I'm super tired. Maybe I won't dream... fat chance.

Your Body's Cold, But Girl We're Getting So Warm

So this morning was last night. My friend and I talked online forever this morning and browsed some higalarious pictures. The best quote of the day:
"he shoud really not put pics like that up. someone could see them! like us!"
I think I might have died this morning. It was excellent. After that, I did my makeup so as to maximize looking dead in case I decided to venture out in public later.

By the time I woke up at 4 though, I'm pretty sure I just looked undead. Ace.

Anyway, obviously I woke up at 4, Carol woke me up, actually. I got dressed and went over to her house, complained about how I was being haunted in my dreams for a while, then she suggested that we pick up Brian and watch "An American Haunting" which was really good and had James D'Arcy who is a total babe. But I'm not going to lie, I totally had no idea what was going on half the time. After that, we watched V for Vendetta, which is always excellent.

Half way through V, we stopped and had a seance with a homemade ouija board. The spirit we were talking to was named Worx, it was nice, it wasn't Carol's father, and it neither loved nor hated us. Apparently, I'm not going to die when I go to California for Christmas. I'll start hanging out with my future husband in 7 weeks, we'll start dating in 4 months, I'm getting married when I'm 21, and apparently we're having 14 kids. But seriously... it's a ouija board.

Anyway, after V for Vendetta was over, I went home and watched Final Destination 3 with Eric. It was hilariously bad, but had rather excellent gore. Not my favourite though. On my way home though, I chomped on my tongue ring and broke one of the balls and I have no clue where my bling bag is so I have no way to change it until I clean my room or car or something. Jim and I decided to name my pillow Marluxia.

This was the most fun and most eventful day I've had in a while.

Excuse Me While I Kiss The Sky

This is my pillow. It looks like a dead mouse. I'm only now getting around to taking a picture of it.

My room is gross. It wants cleaning.

I've Got Soul, But I'm Not A Soldier

I am amazing.

So, the last few days have been super boring. The only really interesting thing that has happened is that I ripped the left side of my tongue, so that piercing hurts like fuck when I eat or move it. Thankfully, I only ever play with the right one anyway.

Falling Down The Wall; Strategically

This morning when I woke up freakishly early it was snowing like hell, so naturally I checked to make sure Pine Knob would be opened, of course it was. I called around to see if anyone wanted to go, which they didn't, so I went back to sleep until noonish, when I woke up again, it was still snowing and I couldn't wait another day to go boarding. So, at 2:30 I left in jeans and a sweatshirt. I couldn't be bothered to find my actual gear.

Anyway, I got there at about 3, got my ticket and hit the hills straight away. The powder was SWEET. Best weather I've had on a boarding day in a few years at least. I made some friends and stuck with them for entertainment. We braved "The Wall" which is this horrible mogul ridden nearly vertical, ice covered, double black diamond slope. I've discovered that it is impossible to board the wall on your back edge, it must be done on the front edge and you have to be careful not to decapitate your boarding buddies... not that that actually happened.

After that, we decided to go into the lodge for a while to get warm.
It didn't work.

After tearing it up for a few more hours, I decided to call it a night as I was bloody freezing and my jeans were soaked. My last run was completely epic, just so you know. I think I came.

Instead of driving home in my board boots and wet jeans, I stripped to my underwear and a hoodie in the parking lot, got hit on, and changed into black skinnies and my moon boots. So much more comfy. It didn't really matter anyway because the jeans were doing nothing to keep me warm and my legs were 100% numb, and I actually decided to wear underwear today, so yeah, it all worked out fine.

On my way home, I stopped at maccas for some fries and then 7-11 for some candy and a Juno blue slurpee. Ace.

I have a terribly exciting bruise and I'm pretty sure I died a little on The Wall. I love fucking myself up while boarding.

If You Must Falter Be Wise

So... yesterday, for the first time in my life, my mother asked, for serious, if I was on drugs. I laughed, and she asked what and how often. I gave her the honest answer that I don't do drugs, thank you very much. It was kind of startling that she actually thought I was on drugs, when really, I'm off drugs.

Anyway, today I half-raked the leaves. I got cold though, so I watched TV and had soup. And then I put my cat in my coat to keep me warm and went and raked the rest of the front yard and it was dark by then, so I just kind of gave up.

I got home and got this excellent e-mail from SuicideGirls telling me that I'd be totally perfect for the site and such. I'm waiting until I move to fill out the rest of my application though. But yeah, I was pretty fucking excited about that.

Disturbia is currently my drug of choice.

Happy To Be Tortured

Yesterday morning I woke up at 5 am and watched Vh1 and discovered just how much I really do like the All-American Rejects. I was lazy until about 10 or so at which point I finally got my ass up and had yummy cereal for breakfast.

Mum and I drove to City Hall in Windsor to go to Service Canada and got my social insurance card. It took like, ten seconds. We came back to Detroit and ate at the HRC. They actually have vegan food, unlike the HOB, and our waiter was awesome. I took half of my left-over veggie burger home, but left it at my mother's house. Oh well.

By that time, it was pretty late, so I decided to just go to class. But, I remembered that ROT is right across from the school parking lot, so I parked and went right in. I brought $100 with me. As a Christmas present to myself, I got my lip tattooed!

I thought the placement and statement were appropriate.

Also, this is what I got done monday:

They're finally done!

I'm bringing sexy back.

Smotemetwice

This was written yesterday, however I had no access to a computer last night, so I'm publishing it today. I will be publishing another post later on today.

So... This morning I woke up at nine, completely exhausted so I went back to sleep until noonish. After that, I stayed in bed interwebbing until about one at which point I got dressed and went to the bank.

On my way to the bank I stopped at maccas for fries and some blue poweraid. I went to the bank drivethrough with the cool vacuusuck tubes and cashed a cheque and then headed to the tattoo parlour.

John was heading out when I got there so he let me watch the shop for an hour or so while he was gone, which was fun. I took some calls, talked to a few walk-ins, and signed for a package. Sweet. When John got back, he had to head back out to the bank, so while he was out, he bought me some more french fries.

After that, we finally got started. He shaded in two feathers and some lady walked in with a question about navel rings. We got back to it just as Van Halen's "Jump" came on, and I love that song. It went pretty quickly and we finished up with a Motley Crue song.

The tattoo looks totally amazing, but I'm not going to lie, right now, bras are my worst enemy. Since it was finished, I drove into RO, picked up some sushi and went to my mom's place. After dinner I played KH2 for a while and am currently stuck in a rather impossible battle with Jaffar. And I thought Xaldin and Demyx were hard... Athough, to be honest, I've only tried to beat him once. Its one of those annoying magic carpet battles and I'm all by myself, I'll probably try one of my forms or switch my keyblade to something stronger.

Anyway, I decided to spend the night there so I fell asleep on the couch while watching the history channel.