I don't like small towns.
I don't like cold weather.
I don't like Alberta.
I don't like mountains.
I don't like living somewhere without large bodies of water.
I don't like having to wear clothes all the time.
I don't like it here.
I want to go back to Toronto.
This isn't my deal. I'm not a fan.
I tried it.
I don't dig it.
I want to come home.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Friday, February 25, 2011
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Yo Ho A Pirate's Life For Me
I remember once upon a time I used to ask for CDs at Christmas and for my birthday.
Yeah. That doesn't happen anymore... seeing as I just download an average of 4 CDs per week.
Depending on the week.
It gets up to 20 or so in a day.
Yeah. That doesn't happen anymore... seeing as I just download an average of 4 CDs per week.
Depending on the week.
It gets up to 20 or so in a day.
Smuggery
There's a certain undeniable smugness you feel when you
And then there's just the smug, "Yeah. I just fucked."
Everything about the above picture reminds me of that exact smuggery I felt for a straight week after I got laid for the first time once upon forever ago.
And then I definitely get a smuggy face when thinking about somethings like that. I love smuggery.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Sunday, February 20, 2011
I'm So Blogging This...
Last night I was supposed to stay with my roommate in a charming little bed and breakfast in Banff.
Now, if you know anything about me, you probably (should) know about my ridiculously severe vomit phobia.
If someone vomits in my vicinity, I will vacate the area while having severe panic attacks: hyper ventilating, crying, and shaking uncontrollably.
Suffice it to say, I don't do barf.
Anyway.
I went to bed at 11 or 12 and my roommate was still out doing whatever.
He came home past 1am, woke me up, then went and started puking in the bathroom because apparently he drunk himself into oblivion or whatever.
I told myself I was being paranoid and hearing things.
At 2:30, I really couldn't hold myself together anymore, so I quickly packed up my things, called a cab to take me back to Canmore, and went outside the B&B.
On my way, I had to step over my semi-coherent roommate who was sprawled on the floor of the hallway, shirtless, upper half in the bathroom, legs in the hall. What even.
"Can't sleep. Gotta go. Take the bed. Byeeeee!!!!"
And I was gone. I spent the night at a hostel in Canmore which was mega and way more relaxing.
Now, if you know anything about me, you probably (should) know about my ridiculously severe vomit phobia.
If someone vomits in my vicinity, I will vacate the area while having severe panic attacks: hyper ventilating, crying, and shaking uncontrollably.
Suffice it to say, I don't do barf.
Anyway.
I went to bed at 11 or 12 and my roommate was still out doing whatever.
He came home past 1am, woke me up, then went and started puking in the bathroom because apparently he drunk himself into oblivion or whatever.
I told myself I was being paranoid and hearing things.
At 2:30, I really couldn't hold myself together anymore, so I quickly packed up my things, called a cab to take me back to Canmore, and went outside the B&B.
On my way, I had to step over my semi-coherent roommate who was sprawled on the floor of the hallway, shirtless, upper half in the bathroom, legs in the hall. What even.
"Can't sleep. Gotta go. Take the bed. Byeeeee!!!!"
And I was gone. I spent the night at a hostel in Canmore which was mega and way more relaxing.
Joel
When I was 13, there was Joel.
I was working as prop crew for the community theatre production of Tom Sawyer and he was playing Injun Joe.
I've always had a thing for the villains.
He was 18, 6+ feet tall, and had long hair. And was an ACTOR. Which is always attractive until you realize what flakes most actors are.
When I was 13, I looked significantly older than I was. Like... 15 or 16 at least. It was probably the tits.
Anyway, I saw him at the auditions and decided he was yummy and that I wanted him... which was probably mostly because he was 18 and I knew I couldn't have him because there was no way someone like that would want someone like me.
SO... I did the whole flirty thing during rehearsals. The shy, lame 13 year-old-girl, flirty thing. The one that isn't charming and never works and people think is just cute because you're just a little girl. The "oooh she wants to talk to you!!!" but then run away when he comes over... yeah. I was lame. I'm still lame. Whatever.
Eventually we did start talking. And I guess he rather liked me, because he'd come up behind me and stand right against my back while entwining his fingers with mine.
At which point I decided that he was severely creepy because after all, I was just 13 and he was 18 and that's gross. Never mind the fact that I currently have an enormous embarrassing crush on a guy who is 6 years older than me. But I was just 13, so it was weird and creepy.
So after that I avoided him. And ever since then I have been aware of the fact that I only want what I can't have, and once I can, it's not so much fun anymore.
Suffice it to say, I'm doomed in terms of relationships.
I was working as prop crew for the community theatre production of Tom Sawyer and he was playing Injun Joe.
I've always had a thing for the villains.
He was 18, 6+ feet tall, and had long hair. And was an ACTOR. Which is always attractive until you realize what flakes most actors are.
When I was 13, I looked significantly older than I was. Like... 15 or 16 at least. It was probably the tits.
Anyway, I saw him at the auditions and decided he was yummy and that I wanted him... which was probably mostly because he was 18 and I knew I couldn't have him because there was no way someone like that would want someone like me.
SO... I did the whole flirty thing during rehearsals. The shy, lame 13 year-old-girl, flirty thing. The one that isn't charming and never works and people think is just cute because you're just a little girl. The "oooh she wants to talk to you!!!" but then run away when he comes over... yeah. I was lame. I'm still lame. Whatever.
Eventually we did start talking. And I guess he rather liked me, because he'd come up behind me and stand right against my back while entwining his fingers with mine.
At which point I decided that he was severely creepy because after all, I was just 13 and he was 18 and that's gross. Never mind the fact that I currently have an enormous embarrassing crush on a guy who is 6 years older than me. But I was just 13, so it was weird and creepy.
So after that I avoided him. And ever since then I have been aware of the fact that I only want what I can't have, and once I can, it's not so much fun anymore.
Suffice it to say, I'm doomed in terms of relationships.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Alice
I hate being sick.
But I love that when I am, all I can think about is Alice in Wonderland.
My friend Simon got me a white rose, a red rose, and white wildflowers for Valentine's Day.
All I can think of is painting the roses red.
It's the best.
+ I picked up Alice's Adventures in Wonderland today at the school library while I was playing librarian. It was way better than having to read it as the pdf. file I've got of it on my computer.
But I love that when I am, all I can think about is Alice in Wonderland.
My friend Simon got me a white rose, a red rose, and white wildflowers for Valentine's Day.
All I can think of is painting the roses red.
It's the best.
+ I picked up Alice's Adventures in Wonderland today at the school library while I was playing librarian. It was way better than having to read it as the pdf. file I've got of it on my computer.
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Things I Thought Would Be Awesome When I Was Seven:
Growing up
Living alone
Having a cast
Things that actually are awesome:
Living alone
Things that are pretty shit:
Growing up
Having a cast
It's blue. In case anyone wondered.
Living alone
Having a cast
Things that actually are awesome:
Living alone
Things that are pretty shit:
Growing up
Having a cast
It's blue. In case anyone wondered.
Monday, February 7, 2011
Splinter
I have a chunk of metal wrapped around my thumb/wrist.
Last wednesday, I was on my way home from school/work and I slammed my hand into the side of a metal truck when I slipped on some ice. Ouch.
Then, on Thursday, I fell on said same hand while skiing because I'm kinda fail at skiing across ice on a steep mountainside. (However, I fucking rule at snowboarding)
It's quite handy and keeps my thumb protected... but is also ridiculously annoying. I should re-wrap it.
In other news, Gord(on Bombay) and I (Danish) get to stay home this week and cook for everyone else. Today we're making icecream and we're getting a new house mate. He's called Terry and internet creepery has led us to believe that he's from Malta or something. So we've been calling him either The Fox (Terry Fox) or The (Maltese) Falcon.
We think we're so clever.
Last wednesday, I was on my way home from school/work and I slammed my hand into the side of a metal truck when I slipped on some ice. Ouch.
Then, on Thursday, I fell on said same hand while skiing because I'm kinda fail at skiing across ice on a steep mountainside. (However, I fucking rule at snowboarding)
It's quite handy and keeps my thumb protected... but is also ridiculously annoying. I should re-wrap it.
In other news, Gord(on Bombay) and I (Danish) get to stay home this week and cook for everyone else. Today we're making icecream and we're getting a new house mate. He's called Terry and internet creepery has led us to believe that he's from Malta or something. So we've been calling him either The Fox (Terry Fox) or The (Maltese) Falcon.
We think we're so clever.
Saturday, February 5, 2011
CSI
When I was in High School, one of my boyfriends/bestfriends and I woud watch it every week while on the phone with each other. We'd discuss the cases and who we thought had done the crimes and we never failed to mention how hot Catherine Willows was looking that week.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
The Beast Below
One of my favourite episodes of Doctor Who is called "The Beast Below". (I highly recommend watching this show as it is amazing.)
"So is this how it works, Doctor? You never interfere in the affairs of other peoples or planets... unless there's children crying."
He does, but that's not the point of this episode. The point is that if you can do something, you shouldn't have to watch children cry...
"What if you were really old, and really kind, and alone. Your whole race dead, no future. What couldn't you do then? If you were that old, and that kind, and the very last of your kind, you couldn't just stand there and watch children cry."
I really can't either.
But, working in an elementary school, it usually happens at least once a day. And usually, the reason they are crying is because they want attention, or they're having some sort of fit in order to get what they want, or because they can't get what they want. So I just have to watch them cry because it's teaching them some sort of lesson or something ridiculous like that.
During gym, apparently one boy elbowed another, which resulted in the elbowee crying on the bench. I went to see what was wrong, and he told me, so since it wasn't some sort of attention fit or whatever, I hugged him, picked him up, and carried him to his teacher and told her what had happened, and then sat back down on the bench with him.
Hugging children when they're crying feels a million times better than having to just ignore them.
A horse and a man, above, below,
One has a plan but two must go.
Mile after mile, above, beneath,
One has a smile, one has teeth.
Though the man above might say hello,
Expect no love from the beast below.
In bed above we're deep asleep,
While greater love lies further deep.
This dream must end, this world must know,
We all depend on the beast below.
"So is this how it works, Doctor? You never interfere in the affairs of other peoples or planets... unless there's children crying."
He does, but that's not the point of this episode. The point is that if you can do something, you shouldn't have to watch children cry...
"What if you were really old, and really kind, and alone. Your whole race dead, no future. What couldn't you do then? If you were that old, and that kind, and the very last of your kind, you couldn't just stand there and watch children cry."
I really can't either.
But, working in an elementary school, it usually happens at least once a day. And usually, the reason they are crying is because they want attention, or they're having some sort of fit in order to get what they want, or because they can't get what they want. So I just have to watch them cry because it's teaching them some sort of lesson or something ridiculous like that.
During gym, apparently one boy elbowed another, which resulted in the elbowee crying on the bench. I went to see what was wrong, and he told me, so since it wasn't some sort of attention fit or whatever, I hugged him, picked him up, and carried him to his teacher and told her what had happened, and then sat back down on the bench with him.
Hugging children when they're crying feels a million times better than having to just ignore them.
A horse and a man, above, below,
One has a plan but two must go.
Mile after mile, above, beneath,
One has a smile, one has teeth.
Though the man above might say hello,
Expect no love from the beast below.
In bed above we're deep asleep,
While greater love lies further deep.
This dream must end, this world must know,
We all depend on the beast below.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Kids
I love children so much. I'm so lucky to be able to spend all day with them.
I love my job so, so, so much.
Every morning, I get to go to the library for a half-hour. I have my tea. I check in books. I re-arrange taxidermy birds.
Then, at 9, I go to a 1st grade class and do a bunch of different things. Helping. Reading. Being read to. Cutting. Colouring. Stapling. Saying "please sit at your desk".
After that, at 10, I sometimes go back to the library, or I have morning break for half an hour and then do reading work with 3rd graders... and then I go back to the library, or to lunch.
After lunch, I go to second grade and do general helpful things.
At 2, I go back to 1st grade and help them with their end-of day things, then gym class, then getting all their stuff together to leave school and go home.
Today, I got licked on the arm. Sortof. This boy had been sucking on his fingers... and then he ran them down my arm. Which was kind of gross but also rather endearing. I seem to enjoy the wild-child kids most. The ones who remind me of myself at that age... even if they are mis-behaving all the time. Maybe because they are and do.
I jumped rope in gym class. I was actually still pretty good at it... although next time I think I'll empty out my pockets first next time so that all the contents of them don't go bouncing across the floor.
I got a snowboard and bindings today. So much cheaper than I had anticipated! I was originally expecting the board to be $17 at least and the bindings to be $30+, but as a sweet deal, I got the board and bindings for $18! And I had gotten boots and a bicycle for $20 last Friday. I can't live without a bike, really.
I mean. I can I guess. I did for quite a while... and I miss Otto der Teufel, but you can't beat a cheap bike when your preferred one is unavailable... right? It's kinda fucked, but the frame is nice. It's an old Raleigh with horizontal drop-outs. It's the exact sort of frame I always sort of thought about having. Don't get me wrong, I love Otto more than anything, but sometimes, a vintage frame is nice to have.
I just can't wait to be back on a bike.
I love my job so, so, so much.
Every morning, I get to go to the library for a half-hour. I have my tea. I check in books. I re-arrange taxidermy birds.
Then, at 9, I go to a 1st grade class and do a bunch of different things. Helping. Reading. Being read to. Cutting. Colouring. Stapling. Saying "please sit at your desk".
After that, at 10, I sometimes go back to the library, or I have morning break for half an hour and then do reading work with 3rd graders... and then I go back to the library, or to lunch.
After lunch, I go to second grade and do general helpful things.
At 2, I go back to 1st grade and help them with their end-of day things, then gym class, then getting all their stuff together to leave school and go home.
Today, I got licked on the arm. Sortof. This boy had been sucking on his fingers... and then he ran them down my arm. Which was kind of gross but also rather endearing. I seem to enjoy the wild-child kids most. The ones who remind me of myself at that age... even if they are mis-behaving all the time. Maybe because they are and do.
I jumped rope in gym class. I was actually still pretty good at it... although next time I think I'll empty out my pockets first next time so that all the contents of them don't go bouncing across the floor.
I got a snowboard and bindings today. So much cheaper than I had anticipated! I was originally expecting the board to be $17 at least and the bindings to be $30+, but as a sweet deal, I got the board and bindings for $18! And I had gotten boots and a bicycle for $20 last Friday. I can't live without a bike, really.
I mean. I can I guess. I did for quite a while... and I miss Otto der Teufel, but you can't beat a cheap bike when your preferred one is unavailable... right? It's kinda fucked, but the frame is nice. It's an old Raleigh with horizontal drop-outs. It's the exact sort of frame I always sort of thought about having. Don't get me wrong, I love Otto more than anything, but sometimes, a vintage frame is nice to have.
I just can't wait to be back on a bike.
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